Eve-ntually...

2007-04-24T14:10:00.000+03:00

Do you want to know what a decent, nice fellow's nature truly is (away from all the sweet talk he gives you in daily life)?
Accidently overhear a discussion, you weren't supposed to hear, between him and another male friend about "marking points" and "scoring" with women.

totally repulsive....

2007-04-23T15:17:00.000+03:00

There was a big storm this morning. A door slammed and I woke up, startled. For a moment there, and although not totally awake yet, I was convinced that a new bomb detonated in the neighborhood. The truth is I felt on the verge of hysterical crying, for I just couldn’t take another bombing in the country! (Between you and me, I’ve recently decided that Lebanese people are a lost case khalas & I don’t feel at home here ba2a). A little by little, the details of last night’s dream started to come back to me. There was indeed another bombing in my head, and in my dream, last night, I did weep hysterically.

2007-04-21T10:55:00.000+03:00

Rima think i do not look happy anymore. I wonder where did she get this idea from.

2007-04-20T23:45:00.000+03:00

I still sneak out to eat Vitamine C / Cal-C-vita as candies. I hope I'm not a lost case!

2007-04-19T23:12:00.000+03:00

Symptom Checklist:

Weight gain (check)
Abdominal bloating (think so, don't care anyway)
Stress or anxiety (check and check)
Depression (oh sooo check!)
Crying spells (check and double check)
Mood swings, irritability or anger (CHECK!)
Appetite changes and food cravings (totally!!)
Trouble falling asleep (hmmm, no fine im ok there)
Headache (check)
Fatigue (check)
Trouble concentrating (check)
Social withdrawal (check)
Body temperature increase (maybe, shu 3arrafneh)

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I hate that time!! recommendation: stay away, ill probably make a mashkal wiz you.

and to "you": fine, stay away too whatever.

2007-04-18T20:02:00.000+03:00

Virginia. et La misere.
all the while, they die again and again in Iraq.
who cares.

Don't answer that.

2007-04-18T15:57:00.000+03:00

I
really
miss you
Baba...

Last Night's Dreams

2007-02-06T00:21:00.000+02:00

Yesterday I dreamt another explosion hit Beirut, and the victim this time was no other than… Tony Baroud. Now why on earth would I dream about Tony Baroud? I don’t even like the guy! And in the dream, his giraffe wife was standing before an ambulance, saying (bi ghandara): "Yi, thank God my husband jawzi habibi encouraged me to learn about first aids, yaaay, btetkhayalo!"

I kept thinking what, during the day before, triggered dreaming about Mr. Baroud. Hmmm, could it be the baroud itself? Then, I remembered I had been looking at a magazine with Carole Samaha on the cover, after which I said to my friend: "she's so pretty, can you believe she's 44?" (btw is she really 44?). Back in my mind, I was thinking: "tab why is she still single? Inno look at her! Jamel w meil w zaka w smalla 3leiha w 7waleiha", "is it because this dumb stupid person yalleh esmo baroud afandi broke her heart?" Mind you, I was this huge fan of Carole and I always hated what that sob did to her! (showing solidarity mish aktar :) ) But I didn’t know I hated the guy so much I had to kill him in my dream! That's some solidarity! Tab had I spoken to my friend about the plain thought that crossed my mind, would my subconscious mind still felt the urge of liberating this suppressed urge in a dream??

I also had tons of other weird dreams during that same night: there's this scene where I was eating a cake, prepared by my uncle's wife. It tasted like poison actually, and I was going on eating & feeling nauseated; meanwhile, watching my mom on TV: it seems she was a famous movie actress. Ba3d fi! Khabissa l 3adeh! Bass anyway, I forgot, w I want to go sleep anyway.. yalla later.

Sunbathing

2007-01-24T20:30:00.000+02:00

* picture taken in Baalbeck, September 2006. click to enlarge.

Overdose

2007-01-23T14:14:00.000+02:00

I've watched "Pride & Prejudice" about five times during the past couple of days. I just turned off all local & news channels and runned the movie non-stop. And I can tell you this, if this Mr. Darcy doesn't show up right here, right now, on whatever kind of horses he chooses, even ja7esh iza baddo, I will die of a romance overdose. *sigh*

oh and who cares what's happening outside my office. just leave me alone.

Sick, sick, sick

2006-12-08T16:18:00.000+02:00

So, has it become a competition now on who is more Lebanese than the other?

fine, fine, you are the most perfect political body to be entrusted with the Lebanese nationality, and anyone who dares to disagree with you is just another nation traitor, American worshipper, Israeli agent that emodies pure evil. happy now? Oh and I like the tone. peace-loving and very unity- promotion style. just like it was intended. and the timing? perfect! imagine if the speech was delivered on sunday! how else would we have reminded the sluggish ones to re-load some momentum?

Is it so wrong that some Lebanese may be just as Lebanese as you are? ok, ok, I'll hold till you get the answer back from "other" sources.

New Downtown

2006-12-06T15:13:00.000+02:00

min ghayyer leish ma min ghayyer shu bou el teghyeer na3am sa noughayyer w shu eshbo shu eshbo el teghyeer ya3eesh el teghyeer yeslamleh rab el teghyeeer ana wal taghyeer wa hawak ma te7keh ma3eh mish sheyefneh 3am ghayyer ya 3ammeh ya heik teghyeer ya bala... shu baddak...

Viva la Revolutiona!

P.S. picture source unknown. landed in my inbox.

Tous les Coups sont Permis

2006-11-17T21:40:00.000+02:00

"Non, pas sur la bouche
Je sais, je touche
Le fond du lac
Le temps des cerises est mort
Le diable est dans le corps
Non, pas sur les lèvres
Non c'est pas mièvre
C'est pas le trac

Rien ne dure...
Au dessus de la ceinture"

(La Ceinture- Elodie Frege)

2006-11-01T15:29:00.000+02:00

- OMG, she’s here!
- I can’t believe my eyes!
- Are you seeing what I’m seeing?
- She’s not dead in an earthquake.
- She wasn’t sucked in a Katrina hurricane.
- She didn’t get married and have her fifth child.

What can I say? It’s always amusing to go back to my dance classes and be greeted after few months of absence! Well, I did manage to mutilate myself already (dry blood under my toe skin, scratches on my arm and forehead, broken nails, inability to walk etc…) but nothing like it to forget all about the outside world.

w khalasna ba2a.

Fallait Pas!!

2006-10-29T11:43:00.000+02:00

Je
fais
rien
que
des
bêtises,
des bêtises
quand mes yeux pleurent

2006-10-03T11:29:00.000+03:00

The funniest thing at the office is how boss and colleagues all start to discuss my love life in front of me, as if I'm not there, and then decide whether they should send me to Iraq to marry a terrorist or keep me with them in Lebanon.

- khalas? you're finished deciding my future? tab can I at least have a say in all this?

- shhh... go back to work!

Final Destination

2006-09-29T16:26:00.000+03:00

For all those who are familiar with the Final Destination series (well, I wasn't), I got to watch part three yesterday. The impact of it on me in two words? let's just say I'm freaked out since then. All this blood and talk about signs and death and how it is triggered, and turning the whole thing into a philosophical matter about how you cannot escape what it is written and blah blah blah... well, I'm not the right person to handle it. Yes, I realize it's just a movie, but every damn object on the road, every car, person and darrab el sokhn started to look suspicious. w kamein, I'm not going into an amusement park again in my life. w huh! yeah, you heard me (people who have heard me nag about going there since months ago)

Ramadan started to show its effects on me. been sick since this morning. maybe it's the whole food diet change w tokhbees el akel :(

yalla, supposed to get ready for an iftar with friends. you see, it's a bit difficult when the smell of cooking in the nearby kitchen gives you the nausea.

Yemen

2006-09-28T14:54:00.000+03:00

ok, so I didn't get to go to Yemen after all, but at least I got to see the pictures!

dagger fight shows

don't you just want to be there?

oh and Saleh afandi won, no surprise about that..

Familia

2006-09-28T13:43:00.000+03:00

A couple of days ago, while sitting in a café, I noticed that the woman at the table in front of me was my cousin, from my father’s side - (as in bint 3amti), whom I haven’t seen since more than ten years ago. Of course she didn’t recognize me because I was just a kid back then, but she, on the other hand, was easily spotted: beside the five-time-bigger minor detail, she almost never changed. Oh that was mean of me… make it seven times bigger.

Yesterday, while doing some window shopping, another cousin of mine, from my mother’s side this time (as in ibn khali) nearly touched shoulders with me, tellement on etait proche! And still la 7ayat li man tounadi… I followed him afterwards a la Sherlock Holmes, and watched how my little shy cute cousin met with his girlfriend at the end of the mall’s passageway. Cute! Hal fas3oun!

Anyway, I guess what I’m trying to say, in a way, is that... I do miss those big family gatherings, especially in Ramadan…

and kamein, in a way, I do envy those people with the 10 uncles and 15 aunts, and dozens of cousins, w sitto w jiddo w 3ammo w 3amto w ilakh ilakh...

Bon, end of break. see you when i'm in the mood for blogging.

Boy? Girl?

2006-09-13T11:55:00.000+03:00

It's hectic at work today: last minute preparations, last minute translations, last minute Tchador shopping etc...

The main question among us translators though was (for grammatical purposes): Dakhlek, is Yemen a boy or a girl?

- sabeh, sabeh!
- lek kif sabeh.. it's a girl! bannouta!
- hmm, how to make sure if it's a boy or a girl?
- (...)
- you're giving that look... why are giving me that look
- are you actually aware how "mined" your question sounds?

haydi, hayda, haydi, hayda.. whatever. what sane person has this sort of a conversation in his daily life anyway...

A Treat

2006-09-12T15:58:00.000+03:00

So the previous weekend I indulged myself in a visit to the Movenpick Spa. worth every penny Im telling you! (regardless of the fact that you have to pay this huge sum to stay in an oven called sauna... among other things), but anyway, it was very relaxing (and the least thing to do since the vacation thing was not working at all, as you guys know). You actually reach a state of serenity with the oven heat. I think I even saw a naked man there, heik walking around. no, we're not talking the butt of a Brad Pitt, I mean a naked old man with a potbelly. thank God I wasn't wearing my glasses! Anyway, the showers there are so much fun! You just press a bunch of buttons, and you have flows of water coming either from the sides, or cold flashes on your head, or light gentle drizzles etc... ok, I sound like a baby who's having his first bath. But it's way better than those ads about the woman on a plane, washing her hair with Herbal Essence. (bof! Herbal Essence is such a "deceptive" shampoo btw). and we didn't even get to the hotstones massage part yet! to think they have asked me: "you prefer Joyce or George as your masseur?"! now that answer would have been interesting (in case I'm revealing it to you ya3neh)...

yalla, enough for today. zhe2et sarsara.

The high point of today: My Ashrafiyeh colleague walking in the room, in her Yemen tchador! Never thought something would crack me up hal add!

Meen?

2006-09-11T20:35:00.000+03:00

Can I at least know who called me today on my cell phone (international call), asked for my name in person, then strangely hung up on me?

Come on, I'm dead curious!

P.S. nice voice :)

Lost in Translation

2006-09-07T18:00:00.000+03:00

Hmm... been drowning in dictionaries for too long; spending quite some time with my friend google over here too.

Well that’s what you do when you have a mixed document bita3 kollo. Khabissa ya3neh.

I have to figure out what a certain weird meal called “tapenade” means in Arabic... invent a new word barki... W kamein the ultra-low-rise jeans. Inno ma3leih ya3neh. W ba3dein a bunch of eye diseases and treatments like: monovision, LASIK surgery, PRK, retinoids, endermologie, keratome, conductive keratoplasy… dawwa rasseh. W stuff related to fung-shui, then this margarine butter that’s supposed to be healthy, w new fall shoe trends, w a lot lot more, all grouped in one single document. La2 w shu, a private pilates session is supposed to cost between 150 and 750 SR. SR? SR?! inno isn’t this supposed to be in dollars? Are we talking Saudi Riyal all of a sudden now?

don't authors know translators clean after them? can't they be a little more considerate ya3neh?

Anyway, don’t mind the mood. Add to that inno I haven't eaten anything since last night, and that I’m supposed to wait till seven again tonight. oh yes, that's called fasting. not working for me at all this year.

yalla have to run. later.

My Tuesday

2006-09-05T15:00:00.000+03:00

Work field trip to Yemen!

And I'm not going! :(

Apparently tribes during elections are not the perfect place for a girl.

Ma3 inno nothing else seems more right for me in this particular period.

Inno bye bye Italy vacation, w so long to the Turkey escape, and now this. inno pfff.

Oh and I hate blogs, wish I never started with the whole thing aslan. but once you start, you just cannot stop. you're doomed to blog till the remaining days of your life. to post about you heartbreaks, your wedding day, your first baby, your jobs, the colleagues that you absolutely hate etc... an everlasting mission (for your sake before anyone else's). they should have written that in their manuals. bastards.

So, is it possible to force oneself to stop doing something by... say hypnosis mathalan?

w 3ada zelek, it's a black day in the Kingdom of the Sun, w mish tay2a 7adan. But I guess it already shows.

Have to wait till seven ce soir to eat something. not complaining. can handle it. w killo tamem. 4 hours to go. will be catching a movie kamein after this long break. heard the assassination series (not the movie, the real-life one) is back to Lebanon min awwal w jdid. but if they think that will stop me, qu'ils aillent se faire foutre.

yalla. a toute.

Eyeglasses

2006-09-03T01:08:00.000+03:00

I spent long minutes today searching for my eyeglasses. and all what I was thinking about was: "I wish I can ring them "a missed call" ".

well, maybe I did. but they were set to the silent mode.

blah.